We need to talk.
Fine yeah sure no don’t say anything I GET THE PICTURE!
See the thing is…
Get on with it babe, break my heart
I love you but..
But. BUT. Wtf man how can you have a fuckin ‘but’, you just told me that you loved me!
I can’t take this anymore.
Can’t take what anymore? Is the fact that I’m in love with you and that my every breath sings your name too much for you?
Is that it?!
It’s.. it’s too much. It’s killing me.
It’s killing you?! Are you crazy? The fact that you’re every word is like a hammer to my heart is obviously ‘killing me’!
You’re special.
Why would you let me go if I’m special?
I need time to think.
TIME TO THINK!! You need ‘time to think’ when you know for a fact that I would die for you with just the snap of your finger.
I’m a puppet. You are my master. And. You. Don’t. Want. Me.
I need space.
So what haan, now im ‘crowding you’?! goddamn you! When you wanted to kiss me and hold me and hear my voice at unearthly hours, you didn’t need any ‘space’ then. Why now?
Maybe I just need to be single right now. You’re getting too serious. I mean…I’m only 16.
And I’m hundred fuckin million.
I think we should take a break. Possibly for good.
Murder is a sin.
I still really like you though.
Yeah sure, but obviously not enough. And guess what I don’t ‘like you’. Im ‘in fuckin love’ with you. Bit of a difference there.
We could still be friends.
When you were little, did you ever put your hand into a bright shimmering candle flame just to see what it felt like? It burns. Like hell. Multiply that by trillion and the pain of a thousand knives kissing your blood. Feels like that.
You promised me my life. Among other things.
But you lied.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Last Prayer
I feel sick.
My stomach’s churning, I can barely breathe, I choke on every word and tears cloud my eyes at the slightest provocation.
I am not lovesick.
No one died.
Yet.
I just lost my ipod.
The love of my life!
I left it on the bench in the foyer for a minute and then the wicked witch from the west stole it.
Whygod,
WHYME?
I swear to you on all that is good and holy that if I get it back,
Somehow,
1) I will no longer complain, grumble or whine.
2) And yeah yeah! I will do my math homework. I promise.
3) I will be nicer, specially to people I like ‘cause I’m usually a better person to those that I hate.
4) I will show some amount of concern when someone is sick, in love, in need etc.
5) I will do what I have to do without anyone telling me to.
6) I WILL STRIVE TO ACHIEVE SELF ACTUALISATION.
7) I will never ever be so careless and ahh yesss “irresponsible” again. I give you my word.
Please God, if you do exist and if you love your children and you want them to be happy and live longer you will guide me to my ipod.
Thank you
Amen.
My stomach’s churning, I can barely breathe, I choke on every word and tears cloud my eyes at the slightest provocation.
I am not lovesick.
No one died.
Yet.
I just lost my ipod.
The love of my life!
I left it on the bench in the foyer for a minute and then the wicked witch from the west stole it.
Whygod,
WHYME?
I swear to you on all that is good and holy that if I get it back,
Somehow,
1) I will no longer complain, grumble or whine.
2) And yeah yeah! I will do my math homework. I promise.
3) I will be nicer, specially to people I like ‘cause I’m usually a better person to those that I hate.
4) I will show some amount of concern when someone is sick, in love, in need etc.
5) I will do what I have to do without anyone telling me to.
6) I WILL STRIVE TO ACHIEVE SELF ACTUALISATION.
7) I will never ever be so careless and ahh yesss “irresponsible” again. I give you my word.
Please God, if you do exist and if you love your children and you want them to be happy and live longer you will guide me to my ipod.
Thank you
Amen.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
escapist
Slip out the back before they know you were there
And at the worst you'll see nobody cares
Cos you don't wanna be around when it all goes down
Even heroes know when to be scared
Slip out the back before they know you were there
And at the worst you'll see nobody cares
Cos you don't wanna be around when it all goes down
Even heroes know when to be scared
I'm no hero, you remember how I was, you know
All I ever did was worry, feeling out of control
To the point where everything was going end over end
I'm spinning around in circles again
This is where you come in
All of this to explain to you why
I had to separate myself away from yesterday's life
Please remember this isn't how I hoped it would be
But I had to protect you from me
Thats why I slipped out the back before you knew I was there
I know you felt unprepared
But every single time I was around I just bring you down
And I could tell that it was time to be scared
Thats why I slipped out the back before you knew I was there
And I know the way I left wasn't fair
I didn't want to be around just to bring you down
I'm not a hero but don't think I didn't care
That’s what I do.
I escape.
Doesn’t everyone have a world in which they find their solace?
Where they heal and fight dragons and rescue fair maidens and experience those earth shattering kisses?
Yea well.. me too.
Atleast im normal.
There.
But the worst part is…
I don’t just ‘break away’
I break.
I play with fantasy and reality till they’re so tightly entwined that I lose the ends which calmly plait themselves into one huge great knot keeping my hands tied and my thoughts untied.
She looked at him.
She looked at herself.
Into herself.
He was there.
Perfect.
As usual….
Perfect in her head!
Fuckhim!
And at the worst you'll see nobody cares
Cos you don't wanna be around when it all goes down
Even heroes know when to be scared
Slip out the back before they know you were there
And at the worst you'll see nobody cares
Cos you don't wanna be around when it all goes down
Even heroes know when to be scared
I'm no hero, you remember how I was, you know
All I ever did was worry, feeling out of control
To the point where everything was going end over end
I'm spinning around in circles again
This is where you come in
All of this to explain to you why
I had to separate myself away from yesterday's life
Please remember this isn't how I hoped it would be
But I had to protect you from me
Thats why I slipped out the back before you knew I was there
I know you felt unprepared
But every single time I was around I just bring you down
And I could tell that it was time to be scared
Thats why I slipped out the back before you knew I was there
And I know the way I left wasn't fair
I didn't want to be around just to bring you down
I'm not a hero but don't think I didn't care
That’s what I do.
I escape.
Doesn’t everyone have a world in which they find their solace?
Where they heal and fight dragons and rescue fair maidens and experience those earth shattering kisses?
Yea well.. me too.
Atleast im normal.
There.
But the worst part is…
I don’t just ‘break away’
I break.
I play with fantasy and reality till they’re so tightly entwined that I lose the ends which calmly plait themselves into one huge great knot keeping my hands tied and my thoughts untied.
She looked at him.
She looked at herself.
Into herself.
He was there.
Perfect.
As usual….
Perfect in her head!
Fuckhim!
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
meat
(This is for both of you. And "i'm sorry". Really, I am.)
They faced each other, the lion and the wolf, teeth bared, claws out, the scent of betrayal arousing the fear of what had happened and what was to come.
But then they smiled, the lion and wolf, because now was not the time or the place.
They would save it for later.
Or maybe…
Just maybe,
The meat wasn’t worth it.
They faced each other, the lion and the wolf, teeth bared, claws out, the scent of betrayal arousing the fear of what had happened and what was to come.
But then they smiled, the lion and wolf, because now was not the time or the place.
They would save it for later.
Or maybe…
Just maybe,
The meat wasn’t worth it.
Monday, January 7, 2008
word manipulation!
Yea so I have an overactive imagination.!
How else do you expect me to survive
With people like you?
I will take your life lyrics and twist the truth so it reeks of deceit.
And when I am finished
You will hate me
Question my sanity
But people will want to read your song
Because I completed the fantasy that lay forgotten in the depths of your soul
And one day
Some day
You will thank me for it.
How else do you expect me to survive
With people like you?
I will take your life lyrics and twist the truth so it reeks of deceit.
And when I am finished
You will hate me
Question my sanity
But people will want to read your song
Because I completed the fantasy that lay forgotten in the depths of your soul
And one day
Some day
You will thank me for it.
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Crazy*!>>
He said “they think you’re crazy”
How could it possibly matter?
When it was you I wanted
Your hands caressing my waist
Your lips on mine
Your thoughts
Your touch
Insanity personified?
I doubt it Casanova
Would you agree to me being crazy then?
Nuhuh
Funny part is..
I would.
Now?
I’m not so sure.
For once I actually know what I want.
Hold it… it’s not you!
It’s the feeling you gave me in the beginning
The all powerfulness
The belief that I was beautiful and I could do anything I set my mind to
I still can.
But somehow your confirmation matters.
Why?
“I found telling you the truth the hardest thing to get out
I know it wasn't you that made me feel this way
Will it ever change
Or are we stuck here on our own.
And give it one more try
I don't know if I would stay
I feel so much better now”
“I can’t take it anymore”
I never could.
Chal haan
She’s the crazy lady bete
Don’t talk to her
Don’t look her in the eye
Don’t let her get too close
She might take your all
And leave you with nothing.
Which is everything you had in the first place.
How could it possibly matter?
When it was you I wanted
Your hands caressing my waist
Your lips on mine
Your thoughts
Your touch
Insanity personified?
I doubt it Casanova
Would you agree to me being crazy then?
Nuhuh
Funny part is..
I would.
Now?
I’m not so sure.
For once I actually know what I want.
Hold it… it’s not you!
It’s the feeling you gave me in the beginning
The all powerfulness
The belief that I was beautiful and I could do anything I set my mind to
I still can.
But somehow your confirmation matters.
Why?
“I found telling you the truth the hardest thing to get out
I know it wasn't you that made me feel this way
Will it ever change
Or are we stuck here on our own.
And give it one more try
I don't know if I would stay
I feel so much better now”
“I can’t take it anymore”
I never could.
Chal haan
She’s the crazy lady bete
Don’t talk to her
Don’t look her in the eye
Don’t let her get too close
She might take your all
And leave you with nothing.
Which is everything you had in the first place.
OMG!!!
“Omg! You look soo hot”
“I lurrve your new shoes.. Aldo?”
“Heyy sexy did you watch gossip girl yesterday? Nate is gorgeous! That time they kissed my insides totally melted.”
“Did you know that rahul and diya broke up yesterday? He’s such a bastard.
But wait didn’t diya cheat on him? She was quite friendly with that guy in college wasshissname arjun maan!”
And I am one with them.
These idiots I call my friends
Their world revolves around movies and break ups and real life turns reel
Clones of each other
Same straightened hair, asymmetrical hairstyles, leggings, piercings, blankness mirroring pretty vacant kohl lined eyes
They parrot their idols
A sham of the present.
And I join then
Mocking their insecurities
A broken nail, split ends, sleeves outta fashion, earrings too big
They amaze me
With the seamless way in which they weave through reality
Never stopping to actually think.
Do they know how?
Or do they just do what mommy says?
The things we’re meant ‘not’ to do
Smoking drinking doping
All part of the great plan
Does that fill your emptiness little one?
Can you see through the shimmering curtains the broken glass the cobwebbed corners of the pretty painted room?
I can.
Beneath all the hairspray and the face varnish and the glitter
We’re all ugly.
Does that scare you?
It’s the truth.
If they told you otherwise,
‘They’ lied.
“I lurrve your new shoes.. Aldo?”
“Heyy sexy did you watch gossip girl yesterday? Nate is gorgeous! That time they kissed my insides totally melted.”
“Did you know that rahul and diya broke up yesterday? He’s such a bastard.
But wait didn’t diya cheat on him? She was quite friendly with that guy in college wasshissname arjun maan!”
And I am one with them.
These idiots I call my friends
Their world revolves around movies and break ups and real life turns reel
Clones of each other
Same straightened hair, asymmetrical hairstyles, leggings, piercings, blankness mirroring pretty vacant kohl lined eyes
They parrot their idols
A sham of the present.
And I join then
Mocking their insecurities
A broken nail, split ends, sleeves outta fashion, earrings too big
They amaze me
With the seamless way in which they weave through reality
Never stopping to actually think.
Do they know how?
Or do they just do what mommy says?
The things we’re meant ‘not’ to do
Smoking drinking doping
All part of the great plan
Does that fill your emptiness little one?
Can you see through the shimmering curtains the broken glass the cobwebbed corners of the pretty painted room?
I can.
Beneath all the hairspray and the face varnish and the glitter
We’re all ugly.
Does that scare you?
It’s the truth.
If they told you otherwise,
‘They’ lied.
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